Self Filtering vs. Objectivity

I'm probably one of the few people to complain about this, since it probably is so rampant. But I have an issue with white lies, and skewed objectivity. It's taken me about 20 years just to read the implicit hits from my parents to know what they actually think, and it's annoying. They complain of the facades that they're parents wear, unaware of their own facades.

Now that the angry-man's rant is over, let's get on to the meat of the subject. Is it best to try to make someone feel better, or be completely objective and always tell them what you think.

I'm pro objectivity. For one simple reason, it may hurt the person at first, but they'll be stronger because of it. They're head won't be as swelled afterwards. Before College, I never had any subjective impression on how I draw, and thought I was good. Now, I can better evaluate what I can do, now I know what to look for. If I had a bit more subjectivity in the critiques, I probably would have been better.

However, I can't deny the uses of filtering, lying to encourage someone to keep on going. Parents, must, by nature, see good in their children, be biased towards what they do. Why? learning anything needs time, and if my parents were blunt, then they would have always said that it could be better; that some of it was crap. Faced with such criticism in any field, it would be impossible to believe that I was good at anything.

In the end I became a software developer... why? video-games, and since the computer provided a means of escape, and QBasic seemed to offer all the escape I needed. Want to see the family dog succeed at a level eerily similar to super-mario bros? Code it! Want to be in a star-trek away mission? Code it! Want to fly a plane? Code it! And the list went on. As I wanted something, just coding it would do. If I didn't feel like coding, I'd meditate in front of the blue screen.

Then College came, and with objectivity entering my means of escape, I was opened to new worlds. Those included OpenGL, DirectX, Photoshop, etc. New worlds opened, possibilities emerged.

Now I'm a University student. I know that I learned the most in my beginning College years, and feel as dumb as ever. Up until now, my greatest mistake was to not know myself. To just let things flow.

Now, I'm starting to know myself. The reasons for the ways I am can be traced back to what I don't like about my parents. Things which sound stupid, which I must correct. Self-examination has made me a better person. I now know that the pessimist in my classes was a realist, and knew what he was talking about. I now know why my best friend seemed to have drifted away.

And from knowing myself, I can tell when people are annoyed since they do exactly what I'd do, try to shake them off.

Oi, and to say this blog was supposed to be a test of being able to remain on a subject, and coherently follow an arguement, yet again I followed my heart.

All this to say, if you're reading this, the filtering will make you feel good, but don't dwell on it. Relive life through every moment you can. Turn down the stereo, put yourself in the other's shoes, figure out how you can improve yourself. That is more important than what celebrity is getting a divorce, it gives you a barometer to how you affect people, and how you can leave a more positive impression.

The past defines the present. The present will determine your future. If you can't tap into the past to exploit it's resources, there is no way you can hope to greatly improve the future.